Marty Michaels

When I came up with the random movie reviews concept, the idea was that I would pick a movie completley at random from my 500+ DVDs and review it, but after coming up with Star Trek: The Motion Picture as the inaugural movie, there was no way I wasn’t reviewing The Wrath of Khan next. Without doubt the best of the Trek movies and tied with The Voyage Home as the most famous in a highly scientific poll I just conducted with my next door neighbours (“whit? Star Trek? Aye, wis there no wan where they go back in time? And there wis wan where Spock died, eh?”), there’s not a great deal I can say about TWOK that hasn’t been said a million times before. Which is handy cause it means I can just cuntpaste huge amounts of text. Wait… isn’t that plagirism? Better not do that.

Anyway, the only movie I can think of that is a sequel to an episode of a TV show, TWOK, is set some time after the events (or, rather, non-events) of The Motion Picture. Admiral Kirk is stuck behind a desk pushing paper whilst Spock trains cadets. McCoy, as always, is stuck between the two. A situation arises, as situations in the Star Trek universe often do, and Kirk is forced to take command of the Enterprise to once again fight his old archnemesis Khan, who has taken control not only of the USS Reliant, but also the Genesis device, a deveice with the power to destroy an entire planet. No, it’s nothing like the Death Star. No, really, it’s not. I’m not being sarcastic. Anyway, Kirk and the rest of the finest crew ever assembled head out and after an epic showdown in the Mutara Nebula, Khan is defeated, but not before Spock sacrifies his life to save the ship. Well, kinda. We’ll get back to that later.

Compare that to the plot of TMP and you’ll appreciate the rich human element to this film. Almost every character goes through some sort of emotional journey Kirk faces his past, Spock gives up his life for his friends, Chekov finds his way back to his old ship, Scotty’s nephew is killed (not all that clear in the finished film, granted) and Khan finally gets his shot at revenge. In TMP it seemed like the crew were only there to fill seats on the bridge and react to the view screen, but in TWOK, previously minor characters like Chekov are given things to do rather than just push the odd button. Granted, from a continuity standpoint, it probably should’ve been Sulu that met Khan, but never mind. The cast are first rate as always, with Shatner on particularly fine form. TMP acted like Kirk hadn’t aged a day in the ten years since the end of the original 5 year mission, but in TWOK Kirk’s age is a major theme. When asked how he feels at one point in the film he answers, very succinctly, “I feel old.” Can you imagine the gung ho Kirk of the Original Series saying that? This is a changed man, a man who feels that he has been put out to pasture prematurley by the very orginisation he has devoted his life to serving. Commading a star ship is all this man knows how to do, and his friend and confidante Bones advises him to get his command back “before you really do grow old.” When he finally does regain command of the Enterprise it is crewed almost entirley by cadets, another sign of Kirk’s advancing years – he and his crew are the last of the “old guard,” being phased out by the new group of cadets. This is all handled in a manner most sensitive by director Nicholas Meyer, who never once lets it degenerate into “I’m getting to old for this” nonsense.

Speaking of the new cadets, chief among them is Lt. Saavik, a half Vulcan, half Romulan (maybe) played by a then-hot Kirstie Alley. Spock’s best student, we first meet Saavik when she is taking and failing obviously, the Kobiashi Maru test. One of the more interesting characters created for the Trek films (compare her to the bland Gillian Taylor in Voyage Home), Saavik and Kirk butt heads a few times about Starfleet regulation and there’s even a hint of sexual tension between the two – she is female after all, and we all know the power Kirk has over the ladies. She tends to show more emotion than most Vulcans, crying at Spock’s funeral for example. Of all the characters created soley for the Trek movies, she is the only one to appear in three movies, albeit played by the significantly less good looking and less interesting Robin Curtis. Whilst we’re on the subect of Vulcans, I don’t think it’s much of a spoiler to say that Spock dies in this film. It was about the worst kept secret in Hollywood at the time and it says he dies right on the DVD case, so if you didn’t know he dies then tough. Besides, he doesn’t really die, a fact made obvious by the fact that the net film in the series is called The Search For Spock. How likley is it that Kirk would turn to McCoy at the end of a film called The Search For Spock and say “well, we didn’t find him?” Not very fucking likley. Putting that aside though, Spock’d death is one of the most memorable aspects of the film. Handled sensitivley by Meyer and beautifully written, it is a fitting death scene for a character as loved as Spock. A pity is was all shat on by the next film. “Do not grieve, Admiral. It is logical.” Damn… gets me every time.

Moving on from our heroes to the villain of the peice, the genetic superman Khan Noonien Singh. First introduced in the classic Original Series episode Space Seed Khan ruled Earth in the mid 1990s (what? You didn’t notice?), but was trapped in suspended animation onboard the Botany Bay until Kirk found him in 2267. Being a bit of a bastard, Khan tried to kill Kirk and take over his ship, but Kirk being Kirk, he got his ass kicked and was exiled on Ceti Alpha V. Something terrible happened and Ceti Alpha V became a dead planet (and the Federation never noticed? Really?) and swore he would have his revenge on Kirk. Chekov and the policeman from Terminator find Khan and, being a bit of a bastard, he hijacks the Reliant and sets off to pwn Kirk with the Genesis device. Khan could well be the best villain in all of sci fi. Tied with Vader and Palaptine at any rate. His Captain Ahab like quest for revenge against the man who he thinks wronged him is almost operatic and he is played in a fashion that is itself almost operatic by Ricardo Montalban, one of the most underrated actors of his, or any, generation. It is a grand, theatrical performance that never once crosses the line into parody or becomes silly (see Nero in Star Trek 09). I can think of only one word to sum up Montalban’s performance: he is, quite simply “KHAAAAAAAAN!”

In case it’s not become clear so far, I’ll say that I freakin’ love this film. This and The Empire Strikes Back are the high water marks that I judge any popular sci fi against. The Wrath of Khan was the first film in what is now known as the Star Trek trilogy, so I’ll be reviewing The Search For Spock next. So until then, “I have been and always shall be your friend. Live long and prosper.”

…sniff, sniff.

Tags: random movie review, star trek, the wrath of khan